What a dreary place it would be if we lived in an alpha-numeric world. Yesterday I saw a herd of cows and on the rump of each was stencilled the beast's name: H78, C84, G51, and so on. Imagine the Magic Roundabout if the animals had been mere ciphers. "What's your name?" asked ZBD. "B29," replied the pink cow.
It's too late for cars, of course: instead of defining names such as Westminster, Mayflower and Spitfire, we now have E numbers, C numbers, and A numbers. For example, instead of Guildford, Marlborough and Matlock, we have the A3, A4 and A6. And now the Cannock, or A5 as it's known in Ingoldstat.
I quite like Cannock. Indeed, I would go one stage further and call it the Cannock Chase, given that Audi is in the hunt for a rather elusive animal: the young buck who wants a two-door family car. Try as you might, you will never capture a four-door A5, as none exists.
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