Impatient Drunk Driver Runs Out Of Gas: Calls 911 Claiming To Be Shot All To Get Courtesy Patrol There Faster

There’s a new contender for the world’s dumbest criminal as a 30 year old Detroit man effectively called the police on himself.

According to the Michigan State Police, the man was traveling with a female passenger when they ran out of gas on I-94.  Instead of calling AAA or a friend, the passenger called the Michigan State Police Detroit Regional Communications Center asking for a courtesy patrol to help them out.

She called again “wanting a quick response,” but one apparently never came.  Undeterred, the driver allegedly hatched a plan to ensure a fast response.